WindUpTheatre (JamesOrmiston)

In which I'm a proper swanky businessman and I will destroy all evidence to the contrary

WindUpTheatre (JamesOrmiston) — Sat, 09 Mar 2013 21:48:14 -0800

My business cards arrived! huzzah! Now to force them upon unsuspecting strangers at swanky social gatherings... aaaaaall those social gatherings that I attend.... I initially only bought these because the very persuasive people at vistaprint sent me some sort of coupon, offering me some seemingly amazing discount. I tend to ignore emails that try make me buy things, but this one came with a very pronounced time limit. I'm a sucker for deals that have a time limit. I lose all perspective, and instead of seeing a very generic deal that is offered to everybody on a regular basis, I see a once in a life time opportunity that I will regret missing until my dying day. It also has an element of the ticking-time-bomb trope to it. Who knows what awful awful things could happen if I let it expire?! I chose to let the time very nearly expire before making the purchase. We're talking down to an hour or so. Its how I get my thrills. My approach to most deadlines is to ignore them until the very last minute, then attack them with unrivaled determination, and continue in this fashion until I'm overcome by caffeine addled apathy. What ever stage I am at when this happens, is the final product. The downside to this approach is that I ended up working on it all night and it was 5am before I uploaded my final design. It was like being in art school again. Given these less than ideal conditions, I'm actually pretty pleased with the final result. I should also mention that as you try to complete the purchase on the website, innumerable tacky but still compelling ads flood your screen telling you 'FOR 10 MINUTES ONLY, GET ANOTHER 250 CARDS FOR $16.' So of course, the aforementioned switch went off in my brain, and I am now the proud owner of twice as many cards than I could ever hope to use. On top of this I also ended up purchasing magnets, and a shiny card holder, because they flashed at me in a similar fashion. I have a problem ok?! I think this story serves the dual purpose of explaining how I came to have a business card, and also approaches the issue of why I'm not allowed near boxing-day sales without the supervision of a proper adult. Farewell til next week. http://www.facebook.com/FancyPigeonGallery

In which my vacuous, sleep deprived ramblings are expressed through text.

WindUpTheatre (JamesOrmiston) — Wed, 27 Feb 2013 02:26:41 -0800

I couldn't decide if I should begin this post with another apology for it's lateness, or if I should ignore it completely and get straight into what i've been keeping myself occupied with for the last week or so. Neither seemed sufficient. Apologies make me seem conceited, as though I think people are in anyway concerned with when I post. And jumping straight into what I've been doing would only serve to emphasize how little I've achieved this week. Much better to flesh out a word-count with a laboured meta analysis of the internal conflict that comes with starting a post, yes? We're all agreed? lovely. On to the riveting weekly adventure I suppose.... My girlfriend Natasha, who I have been living with for the pass year and a half, Has had to return to Australia to complete her university studies. Whats with these people who actually finish their degrees huh? I don't understand it. I managed to sky rocket my way to my much-envied position of some-guy-who-stands-by-an-embroidery-machine-all-day, with only half a psychology degree, and half an art degree! but some people just aren't satisfied with the dizzying fame and fortune that comes with such a position.... So yeah, needless to say it's a bit of a sad time. But I'm keeping busy. Sewing pockets to shirts, and designing a business card, has taken up the bulk of my time. Yeah thats right, I apparently consider myself so important that I deem it necessary to have my name and number printed on pretty card, in anticipation of the hordes of people that will no doubt be clambering for my contact details when I become a famous something or other. Also, before natasha left, we had a play around with the chromablast printer at work. Basically its a fancy heat transfer. So we made some space-kitty apparel for her friend. They came out pretty cute. I probably need more space cats in my life. Ok, sleep is starting to take over my brain. That makes this the arbitrary end of this post. I'm even going to be a little crazy and not read it through before hitting 'publish this'. There might be typos. There might misused apostrophes that imply possession rather than plural. But that's just the kind of crazy cat I am. until next time, farewell. http://www.facebook.com/FancyPigeonGallery

In which t-shirts are coming....

WindUpTheatre (JamesOrmiston) — Sun, 17 Feb 2013 01:16:06 -0800

heeeeeey people. I like that my posts have been belated so often that they are now on sundays again, as originally planned, only they're a week behind.... I'm in a similar position with my rent. I've put it off so often that i'm back to paying it on the 1st of every month as my contract stated. Except they're all one month late. This has been another week of things that can't be displayed in blog format. So to the completely theoretical reader who in any way cares about the behind the scenes of what I make, I apologise.... It's been a lot of pretending I know how to code for the Fancy Pigeon Clothing website (coming soon i swear!) and trying to design a business card. I thought business cards would be a lot more fun, but as it turns out, after years of exclusively drawing in pencil, my colour sense has atrophied, making the whole process needless complicated. I did get around to embroidering some bunnies to t-shirts. Oh how I've grown tired for bunny embroideries... tweeking the tiny details over and over so they come out right.... It drives you a little crazy after a while. I can't wait to have them all done so I can move on to the next design! In saying that, I'm pretty pleased with how it looks. Especially the red one. The pattern shows up on it really clearly. I just have to embroider them on some different colour t-shirts and they should be ready to go! I hope I have something more than bunnies to share next week.... but don't hold your breathe.... Farewell! http://www.facebook.com/FancyPigeonGallery

In which I did a thing

WindUpTheatre (JamesOrmiston) — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 02:47:24 -0800

must not sleep..... must post and pretend this post, like every other post, isn't pass my self imposed due date.... Ok so this week I realised I've been neglecting my t-shirt duties. I think my brain conspires against me and stops me finishing things that I start. I begin projects with great enthusiasm and then my brain starts suggesting tangentially related projects to distract me. I will be working away on a T-shirt design and my brain says, "you know, you're going to need a website to sell these t-shirts...." And I go, "hey yeah!" and then start making a website. And then my brain says, "you know, You should probably have pretty boxes for the tee's to go in..." So I stop doing the website and start googling apparel boxes. So I soon found myself with a room full of apparel boxes, various hang-tags, scribblings of potential logos, and some conspicuously un-embroidered tshirts, staring at me in silent accusation.... So that was my goal for this week, to actually make some finished products. If only because the apparel boxes were looking a bit empty. So yeah, here is a pocket tee of one of the designs I posted a couple of weeks ago. It took a few attempts. Again, I forgot I don't know how to sew, so I had some trial and error before I got it looking presentable. I also put a lot of time into prettifying a few of the other bunny designs, which I will post shortly. On an unrelated note, 'prettifying' Is apparently a spell-check approved word. No squiggly red line of wrongdoing in sight. I was not aware of this. huzzah. Here is me looking tired and unimpressed, but bunny-pocketed. And thats what counts.

In which sewing proved harder than expected....

WindUpTheatre (JamesOrmiston) — Thu, 31 Jan 2013 00:15:02 -0800

Soooo this week has been somewhat of a failure. I have a collection of half-finishedy, unpresentable things. Which isn't something that looks particularly interesting on a visual arts blog. But I made a flimsy commitment to posting weekly, So post weekly I shall! The only thing worth sharing from this week was my first attempt at making a wallet. I found there were a number tweed jackets at a second hand shop, for $2 each, So I grabbed as many as I could carry and decided to try and make a wallet from them. It sounded really easy in my head because I often forget that I don't know how to sew. I bought a sewing machine on a whim a few months ago, and upon acquiring it, lost all ambition of actually sewing anything. So it has just sat unused since then. Looking accusingly at me from the corner.... But yeah, So I started by making the pretty outside layer. I cut up a couple of tweed jackets, then placed two tweedy pieces of fabric over each other, cut some holes in the top layer, and then covering up the rough edges using the embroidery machine at my work. That part went surprisingly well, but then my lack of sewing ability became an issue when I tried to sew it into a wallety shape. It became all lumpy, and reluctant to magically look how I hoped it would look in my head. Sigh. I don't like when things don't go perfectly first time! I find the thought of some skills taking time and effort to require very restrictive. So there you have my half-finished, lumpy wallet. I shall present my second, and presumably vastly improved, attempt next week. And perhaps a new drawing? I have started a new weird little drawing. My first time drawing in many many months. It does feel good. Farewell!

In which tuesday is the new sunday

WindUpTheatre (JamesOrmiston) — Tue, 22 Jan 2013 02:40:09 -0800

Tuesday seems to have become my day to post. There is something about 2 days after a due-date that makes me do things. I'm filled with just enough oh-yeah-there-is-that-thing-I-really-need-to-do productiveness, before It clicks over to Oh-yeah-there-is-that-thing-I-didn't-do-so-I-should-hide-from-it-and-hope-it-goes-away.....ness. The very 'ness' I am trying to avoid this year. This week (we're pretending I wrote on Sunday) I did some new embroidery designs. Yes, more bunnies. I know, how predictable... must move on to other animals. I quite like this one. I'm thinking of putting it onto t-shirt pockets. I promise t-shirts will happen soon. I've been working on a website to sell them through, and I've even bought pretty boxes and swing tags. I'm a sucker for details like that. I imagine the site should be up, and selling pretty embroidered t-shirts by early February, if you are favourably inclined to such things...wink wink. My attempt at photorealism that I alluded to last week is currently not fit for sharing. Thats the thing with trying to paint realistic, you can't even pretend its inadequacies are stylised or intentional. It's currently lying facedown in the corner until I gain the strength to look at it and try again. One photo doesn't seem enough to share though, so have some photos of the gallery. The birdy skull is by my girl friend Natasha ( http://society6.com/Vanitylife ). I'm a fan of it. I also wish I had more circle frames in my life... perhaps one day. farewell until next pretend-sunday. http://www.facebook.com/FancyPigeonGallery

In which i'm late for a very important date.

WindUpTheatre (JamesOrmiston) — Mon, 14 Jan 2013 20:44:16 -0800

I WILL UPDATE SOCIETY 6 WEEKLY I WILL UPDATE SOCIETY 6 WEEKLY I WILL UPDATE SOCIETY 6 WEEKLY I WILL UPDATE SOCIETY 6 WEEKLY ok so first week attempting to update Society 6 weekly and I already failed. Not a great start... But I shall remedy this. So this was my first week back at work. I've never been great at balancing work with art. Or balancing any aspects of my life for that matter. But the work and art balance is one of those things I really must master. At least until some eccentric oil tycoon buys all my work at exorbitant prices so I can be a full time artist. Why must all my plans necessitate eccentric oil tycoon? I did manage to get a new embroidery done. I really must stop making bunny skeleton embroideries before people start to think me strange. But until I do, here is another. It's got to be tweaked a bit, but I think it's an ok design. wow I just realised the term is "embroider" not "embroid". What a silly bunt. I've been calling it 'embroiding' instead of 'embroidering' for over a year now. In my defense, 'embroidering' is more awkward to say. I will just have to petition the oxford english dictionary to have it changed. So there you have it. The total sum of my efforts last week. I shall endeavor to have more to share by the end of this week. Tonight I start practicing my photorealism painting skills. To the best of my knowledge, I have no such skills, but if it so happens that I can recreate some semblance of realism, I shall be sure to share the results. If not, I shall lie and destroy all evidence to the contrary. Farewell until next time. http://www.facebook.com/FancyPigeonGallery

In which I'm uncharacteristically productive

WindUpTheatre (JamesOrmiston) — Thu, 03 Jan 2013 03:33:55 -0800

uuuuuuuuurgh..... That's the sound I make when I remember its been five months since I've finished a drawing. I've been in a some what pretentious and cliched creative coma. If you've ever wanted to be an annoying artist stereotype, you are are welcome to mimic my process, which involves starting a drawing, immediately discarding it when you decide it is too derivative, and then curling up into the fetal position for a few days. Then repeat. And repeat.....Oh and grow a beard. That sort of attention to detail will get you bonus points. Points that can, and will, be exchanged for suspicious looks from shop managers on those rare occasions when you grace the outside world with your scruffy presence... But no more! because now it is a new year, and this beardy stereotype is looking to trade in one set of cliches for a more productive set. Making New Years resolutions seems a useful cliche to adopt. So my resolution is a feasibly broad one of "make more stuff". Good huh? It fulfills my nagging need for a goal, while simultaneously being so pitifully vague that I won't be overwhelmed by it. Genius. I'm attempting to enforce this flimsy goal, by making weekly updates here of what I've been doing in the week. I'm assuming the pressure of having to present my weeks work will force me into doing something worth sharing. A sort of show and tell. But self imposed by a grown man to an imaginary digital class room. Ah, what a normal, normal thing to do... So in that spirit, I BRING YOU THINGS! Embroided things. Look at me being all productive and stuff. I'm finding that working in a completely different medium has been super helpful. You might recognize a couple of them. I re purposed some of my older works "In which the cat is dead and alive" and "In which a rabbits anatomy is observable". I attend to make a more and then perhaps have a go at starting a small clothing label....maybe? that seems like something that could happen.... Check out my gallery's facebook page if you want more pretty pictures and updates of what i've been doing. http://www.facebook.com/FancyPigeonGallery That is enough rambling for one night methinks. Happy New Years everybody. I trust it will be lovely and productive for all.

In which discounts happen.

WindUpTheatre (JamesOrmiston) — Tue, 06 Nov 2012 22:57:33 -0800

$5 off. wooo! Go buy things! http://society6.com/JamesOrmiston?promo=245d84

In which I spy a specter (For Sale)

WindUpTheatre (JamesOrmiston) — Mon, 27 Aug 2012 01:42:09 -0700

A rather stylish one

In which paranormal investigator is my fallback career (For Sale)

WindUpTheatre (JamesOrmiston) — Fri, 17 Aug 2012 04:59:28 -0700

A ghost is waiting...

In which things happened at Fancy Pigeon

WindUpTheatre (JamesOrmiston) — Thu, 09 Aug 2012 04:10:47 -0700

My laptop has become sluggish from a combination on ill-gotten British comedies and massive photo files, so I've decided one of them needs to go. A decision made easy when one considers the implications of a life without Stephen Fry's voice close at hand. *shudder* But I digress. So in wading through the innumerable, unnamed files, I came across some completely candid and in nooooo way staged *cough* 'behind the scenes' photos from the "Cereal Killer" photoshoot I did a little while back at Fancy Pigeon. Which one could find here: http://www.facebook.com/FancyPigeonGallery if they were favorably disposed towards such things....*nudge nudge* I thought perhaps they might be of some vague interest to you kids? If only to laugh at how unprepared I was for the milk going everywhere. It was some time before I was able to rid the gallery of the slightly offensive milky odour. I now understand why there are no milk-based cologne. Also here is a GIF of me eating from a skull. It's a new craze I'm starting. I'm hoping it will catch on in the goth community. http://gifninja.com/animatedgifs/132448/cereal-killer.gif yeah, it turns out I don't like fruitloops...

In which pigeon haberdashery is an untapped market (For Sale)

WindUpTheatre (JamesOrmiston) — Tue, 07 Aug 2012 21:02:06 -0700

http://www.facebook.com/FancyPigeonGallery

In which I somehow have a gallery

WindUpTheatre (JamesOrmiston) — Mon, 06 Aug 2012 23:21:49 -0700

Yeah. It’s best not to question it, lest our incredulity frightens it out of existence. But as I type this, I have indeed come into possession of a small art gallery to hang my art and pretend I know anything about how to run a gallery. I named it Fancy Pigeon Gallery. Again, it's best not to question it. Like all healthy people, I have come to treat the number of ‘likes’ as units of self worth, as I stare at the screen hitting refresh. So I would be dizzy with excitement if any of you should come ‘like’ the facebook page http://www.facebook.com/FancyPigeonGallery Thus affirming my existence. For your efforts, you will, in time, be awarded with giveaways of T-shirts and art prints and things of the like. Also, if having your art exhibited in a small New Zealand art gallery has been your life-long dream, do get in touch with me: james.p.ormiston@gmail.com and we can perhaps make your oddly specific dream a reality!

In which a pigeon is fancy (For Sale)

WindUpTheatre (JamesOrmiston) — Fri, 03 Aug 2012 05:08:06 -0700

come visit me: http://www.facebook.com/FancyPigeonGallery

In which astronomy will have to be revised (For Sale)

WindUpTheatre (JamesOrmiston) — Mon, 30 Jul 2012 00:08:52 -0700

it's going to be a lot of paperwork....

In which I can sleep now

WindUpTheatre (JamesOrmiston) — Sun, 29 Jul 2012 13:32:17 -0700

It's done. After many a caffeine fueled night. It's done. Ready for the Edinburgh Realty Art Awards. There is probably a lesson about time management in there somewhere. but....meh.

In which work is in progress....

WindUpTheatre (JamesOrmiston) — Mon, 23 Jul 2012 03:19:18 -0700

A piece i'm working on for an upcoming art contest. However slowly. Fun fact: My work station for this piece consists of an A1 piece of paper taped to a large wooden board that is itself sat upon an upright cinderblock. I really must invest in a desk....

In which the cave is approached with caution (For Sale)

WindUpTheatre (JamesOrmiston) — Tue, 03 Jul 2012 23:39:57 -0700

Beware the mouth of the cave

Cereal Killer #2 (For Sale)

WindUpTheatre (JamesOrmiston) — Thu, 28 Jun 2012 23:01:38 -0700